I would like to send a package to my husband’s son’s mother. However we have never met. Partially because we are newlyweds and my husband is in the military. What do I say to this lady in a letter? Also, he’s not on child support I just send money in an envelope normally. This time I’m sending a package with a few toys, colors coloring books and a couple of shirts. She also has a son from a previous relationship so I put a few extras in there from him. Well what do I say in the letter without any drama? I hear she likes to keep up drama too….oh joy
Also, I’ve never meet the son, we are seriously newlyweds,….
I dont have kids of my own but I use to be a teacher and worked at daycares while in college should I mention this so she can be assured I’m good with kids even though I dont have my own? I dont like drama, I just want to have a peacful relationship with her. Thanks everybody!!!
Thanks Everyone!
Garden Girl- as I mentioned I don’t like drama but I must defend my husband. He is in the military. We live quite far away in a different state from his son. My husband did ask me to go home with him before but do to my work schedule it was not feasible. He is now deployed overseas fighting for our country. He is a great dad. He calls every time he cans, sends gifts online, and went to visit prior to his deployment.
Kings princess- thanks for giving me your story! Nice to know the side of “the baby mama” You lifted my spirits!
Crisco- Thanks for helping me avoid dram, hope I don’t have to go through your experience…
Florida beach girl- Thanks for your sweetness, humbleness and flattery!
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I would like to send a package to my husband’s son’s mother. However we have never met. Partially because we are newlyweds and my husband is …
5 replies on “How do I introduce myself to my husband’s baby mama in a letter?”
Just start off by saying something like…I know this is probably a little bit awkward..but…….make sure to mention that you are happy and feel very lucky that you two are able to be mature adults in the situation, because so many of them aren’t. Also be sure to compliment her son…he’s so smart, etc…or tell her that he talks about her a lot….I don’t really know. Good luck.
Wow! I have so much respect for you right now. If I were the baby’s mother I would like a nice letter basically introducing yourself and saying that you would like to get to know her and the baby better, make sure she understands that you aren’t trying to take over as the mother but an extra set of hands here to help. Don’t ever talk about your husband with this woman unless he’s coming to town and wants to see his child, but anything concerning your marriage is a no no. Just try to keep it peaceful from your end and keep copies of everything just in case she decides to act like a damn fool.
You know that is very nice of you to even bother to think about the other child. Let me tell you my story, and then you can decide. My son’s dad, was with me throughout my first born’s childhood. He was with me while i was pregnant with her. Grant you he never treated her like his own, and after my son was born, he was a total jerk to her…but that’s another story. I finally got rid of him, and he ended up with some really sweet lady. She finally got the courage to call me up one day to ask if my daughter was allowed to come along with her step dad and his son. I was grateful to her, she ended up telling me that he had portrayed me as some evil person. We spoke for hours, and every time she picked up the kids, they came back with something nice. She was a great lady, and I loved her for accepting both of my kids. I never expected her to be so sweet. She took it upon herself to do something nice for me, and years later, I have done the same for my husband’s kids. You sound like such a sweet lady. You can try to send her a quick note, if she is a drama queen, at least you tried. Good people shouldn’t have to stop being good. Good luck, hopefully she is really not a drama queen.
I agree with what everyone said, personally if I could have done what your doing in a letter I would have. However I met fiancees daughters mother in person. I got out of the van reached out to shake her hand and said I thought we should meet so she knew her daughter was spending time with to give her peace of mind. She was polite for about 2 seconds than went back to her classic snooty self I was told so much about. Do your best, your being the bigger person and that is what is important for the child’s sake. Someone that loves drama you simply will not be able to avoid it with, but you can try to minimize it but not giving into it.
How have you never met your step-son? Not even when you were dating? Wow, he sounds like a great dad. Does he even know his kid?